Archive for category: DEI and Belonging

, , ,

Overcoming Imposter Syndrome: Created On the Outside, Healed On the Inside (Part 3 of 3)

I had the privilege of visiting the historical grounds of Robben Island Prison off the coast of Cape Town, South Africa. All of the tours are led by men who were imprisoned there, and they share their firsthand accounts and experiences. They experienced psychological cruelty and physical suffering that is difficult to imagine at the hands of the guards who tried to break their spirits and sow dissension among the racial groups there. The men resisted by focusing on helping each other. Those with larger rations shared their meager food with others who had less. Their motto was, “Each one, teach one,” and every new prisoner was given a political education that empowered them to organize, remain in solidarity, and mentally resist oppression by building internal resilience and power.

One of the best ways to overcome Imposter Syndrome is to work to eliminate the conditions that cause it. All we need to do is hold a baby to know that we are not born feeling unworthy of love and belonging and inclusion. Our culture, systems, laws, policies, social norms, business practices — all human made — are what create the inner experience that we call Imposter Syndrome.

As we continue to observe, challenge, counter, and heal Imposter Syndrome in ourselves, we have more and more strength available to challenge the systems that create it in ourselves and others. The research is mixed on who experiences Imposter Syndrome. Some studies show that it cuts across demographics and identities, affecting people of all genders, races, ethnicities, social class, sexual orientation, and educational levels. Others show that it disproportionately affects women (especially BIWOC: Black, Indigenous Women of Color), BIPOC, and LGBTQ+ folx. However, we don’t need research to know that rising water lifts all boats. Read more

/by
, , ,

Overcoming Imposter Syndrome: Created On the Outside, Healed On the Inside (Part 2 of 3)

There’s a fable about a renowned aikido master who had a student who said, “Master, I wish for your skill. You never lose your balance!” She replied, “I lose my balance all the time. I just recover faster.”

As we discussed last week, the goal isn’t to stop ourselves from ever having an Imposter Syndrome thought again, but to learn how to recover quickly when we do. We can find solid footing and regain our sense of self-worth and confidence when we get messages that we’re not worthy or don’t belong.

The fundamental truth is that you are as worthy of respect, love, and belonging as much as any other human being. The Buddha said, “You can search the world over and you will find no one who is more deserving of your kindness and well wishing than you yourself.” This is a call to wake up and realize that no one is less than any other.

As women, we are typically socialized to believe that our worth is derived from being accommodating, quiet, demure, smiling, polite, and nice. We are rewarded for being that way, and censured when we are not. BIWOC (Black, Indigenous, and Women of Color) in our culture face even greater challenges because of systemic racial oppression and biases that perpetuate negative stereotypes. Black women experience the maddening double-bind described by Michelle Obama as, “the size of our hips, our style, our swag, it becomes co-opted but then we are demonized.” When we are “too” anything or don’t fit into the Eurocentric, masculine, Christian dominant culture, we often experience overt or subtle messages that we aren’t welcome or don’t belong at the table at which we are sitting, if we have access to the table at all.

Dr. Maya Angelou described the accumulation of these insults and exclusions as “being pecked to death by ducks.” This is how Imposter Syndrome comes to us from the outside, and how over time, we can succumb to the duck bites and start biting ourselves. Read more

/by
, , ,

Overcoming Imposter Syndrome: Created On the Outside, Healed On the Inside (Part 1 of 3)

Let’s be abundantly clear right out of the gate — overcoming Imposter Syndrome is not about toxic positivity or jollying yourself into feelings of false confidence. It’s not about blaming women for their legitimate feelings and ignoring the root causes of Imposter Syndrome. It is about things you can do to support your own healing and take external action to make sure you and other women, particularly BIWOC (Black, Indigenous, Women of Color), are included and feel a sense of belonging.

Even the most famous and seemingly confident women in the world can experience Imposter Syndrome. Oscar-, Emmy-, and Tony-winning actor Viola Davis shares that she thinks, “I’m going to wake up and everyone’s going to see me for the hack that I am.” Former First Lady Michelle Obama says, “It doesn’t go away, that feeling that you shouldn’t take me that seriously. What do I know?”

Healing and prevention — this is the both/and approach that we need in these times of reckoning with bias and inequity. Let’s say that you’re walking down the street and a dog lunges out of a yard and bites you. You can take action to ensure that the owners leash their dog or fence their yard so the dog doesn’t bite anyone else, but you still have the bite. You still need to heal. Read more

/by
, ,

Commitment to Anti-Racism and Disrupting Anti-Blackness

Young women marching for justice.

Across the U.S. and the world, people are rising up to demand transformational action to stop the murder of Black people by police and other injustices that have endangered the safety, health, and well-being of  BIPOC (Black, Indigenous, People of Color) for hundreds of years.

New Leaf strongly stands in solidarity with anti-racism and disrupting anti-Blackness movements and is committed to taking anti-racist action. As a white woman, I am committed to showing up as a better co-conspirator in the movement (watch Dr. Bettina Love explain the difference between an ally and a co-conspirator).

This means that I have to do more than like some Facebook posts and show up at a protest, thinking that I’ve done my part. I have to be committed over the long haul. I will continue to take action and  use my privilege, my body, my resources to support the movement. I will continue to educate myself, and not ask people of color to do any labor for me that I can and should do for myself.

One of my teachers, Dr. Leslie Hinkson, calls for all people to come together to take anti-racist action, with energy and optimism. We can listen to and follow thought leaders of color, support campaigns and organizations led by people of color, and buy from businesses owned by people of color. We can write to our legislators, march in the streets, show up on Juneteenth Day. We can have conversations with friends and family about issues such as defunding the police, the history of race in the US, and the public health crisis of racism. Most importantly, we can vote.

Act. Donate. Speak. Learn. Vote.

We can do this, together.

 

Black Lives Matter Movement 

 

Transforming Policing:

 

Resources for Self-Education:

 

Supporting Black-owned Business

These are resources for Milwaukee, WI – research and find similar resources in your community.

 

 

 

 

 

 

/by

Contact us today for a FREE 30 minute discovery call!

Get My Free Consultation
New Leaf Coaching & Consulting logo

New Leaf Coaching & Consulting is an Organizational Development Consultancy. We help people in values-based organizations work well together so they can do amazing work in the world. We create customized solutions, focused on your goals, so your organization can achieve extraordinary results.